Need

I feel the need to isolate myself from the world, to hide away.

Too much pain and suffering.

I truly wonder just how much more I can take.  I've had love ripped away, destroyed.  I've managed to get back up and continue on with my life, but I wonder if I'll be able to do it again.  Is making a connection with one person worth the risk of my sanity?  My boys don't need someone else in their lives.  They still have their father, and they will always have me.

I'm scared.

Scared of following my heart, and having it broken yet again.  Scared that if I don't follow it, I will miss out on a love that will make all the past broken hearts worth it.  If such a thing truly exists.

I know life isn't easy, and that pain can be worked through.  But I'm tired, just so very tired.  My boys drain me each and every day, leaving so little of me left.